Moving On
Posted by Skyhigh [ Skyhigh6932 AT yahoo DOT com ]; on August 10, 2006 at 16:00:05:
I have to break
this addiction
of my own
lasting and haunting
conviction.
I should not have tried
to know you at all,
the amount that I do
is unbearably small.
I shouldn't have been there,
it's my fault I agreed...
to sit on the side
and not intervene.
I remember the night
when you disappeared
with Cherish,
I didn't feel anything
but hurt and embarrassed.
I couldn't look
at you as you left.
It felt hard to breathe
from the pain in my chest.
Since then I knew
I didn't need you as before,
but wanted to exist
as I tried to leave
my heart at the door.
I was never strong enough
to be anywhere in your life.
Nothing I've said or done
to you
has ever been right.
I've tried too hard
to be around,
and never fit into
your daily crowd.
It makes me so mad
that you're the only person,
who makes me insane
with my intoxicated version.
As far as understanding,
you're the best,
which brings me to
my last request.
Be harsh.
Be cold.
Tell me to F*@# off
and leave you alone.
Tell me I was naive,
no connection,
a meaningless aquaintence...
to free me from
the thoughts of your
analyzing patience.
Be well.
Be happy.
And I'll be the same,
but please remember...
without remembering my name.